Be Gentle with Yourself (and an Invitation to Teach with Us in 2020)
October 24, 2019

Mindfulness Vs Kindfulness:  What's the Difference?

1. Mindfulness is: Holding the Experience.

2. Kindfulness is: Holding the Experiencer

1. #Mindfulness is: "I’m going to a wedding on Saturday, and I think i have a mullet. I told the stylist I was going for the Jason Mamoa Game of Thrones season 2 Dothraki look - but she gave me the short on top, party in the back skating rink pizza party circa 1996 motif.

And what color suit jacket goes with a mullet anyway? It’s obviously a white tux or nothing. When that #meditation bell goes off, i better make a mad dash to the mall before the white tuxes are gone and i’m screwed. Is that Members Only pop up store still open? Is......."

And so ON it goes :)

In my own mindfulness practice - with my legendary powers of rumination, self flagellation and negative imagination - I don't even have to open my eyes, before the bad decisions begin to pile up.

2. Kindfulness is the exact opposite. It’s gentle. And loving. It's playful. And light. It recognizes that everything is going to be okay.

And that everyone loves a middle aged guy with a mullet. Look at Barry Melrose. Plus it’s already hockey season. Someone pass me the puck. #winning.

Mindfulness is a magical practice. But it's easy to lose.

You only need a few noisy neighbors - or an asshole uncle - or a pedantic partner - or any number of interlocutors or interruptions to recognize your mindfulness was a fleeting facade.

Kindfulness, by contrast, invites everything in - not to be merely noticed - but to be intimately embraced.

Start with a smile.
And then scan your body from top to toes.
Love every piece and part of you that is working right now, without asking anything in return.
Your heart for beating.
Your lungs for breathing.
Your eyes for seeing.
Your body for being.

Speaking for myself - this is really an incredibly transformative practice.

Holding myself - my whole self - my failings, my frailties, my foibles - the whole enchilada of experience that the fortunes have foisted on my fragile frame - this is the ultimate embrace.

So regardless of what you’re going through - try it.

Rest your mindfulness muscle for a moment.

And simply smile.

Love yourself.


And laugh.

Sooner or later, the world smiles back :)

And a quick re-introduction, JUST in case you forgot how we met.

My name is Ian, and i’m the founder - baker, blogger and chief candlestick maker at

We are on a mission to reach, teach, empower and inspire a million new meditators in 2020, with a very specific series of practices designed to cultivate confidence, kindness and connection.

We need your help.

If you write about, teach, lead or incorporate “kindfulness” in your daily practice, we’d love to hear from you! Why?

We have a new course coming in early 2020 on the many different ways “loving kindness”+ compassion practices can transform lives - and we need 7-10 new voices, #teachers and contributors who would like to participate in shaping the next generation of meditators - with unique offerings we really do believe, can change the world.

Inbox us on Facebook - or to learn more.

Teach what you know. Do what you love. Wake up the world with your work.



Write a comment...
she kutz up Smith

Hi ian , thank you for creating such a platform to make a difference in the world ..i would love to be apart of such a profound impactful community and the time is now

Mindful Marketplace

thanks so much - I appreciate you!

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